For the latest Bad Writer's Guide, we have decided to tackle the important concept of grammar and usage, but do it in the most useless way possible, because this whole book consists of just 29 sentences, but these sentences are insanely long and only barely get to the point of grammar and you will soon not know what the hell is going on and will you ever get out of the current sentence, but it's okay to be confused about grammar because all the experts have no clue either and to hear grammar gurus go on and belittle you, it is like we all are stuck in one long run-on sentence, just hoping a period (or full stop for you British folk) will show up and save us, and look, here is one now.

The Bad Writer's Guide of 29 Run-On Sentences About Grammar and Usage

Sometimes a book about a film can be a comprehensive and diligent study of the movie. Other times, a book about film is no more than a dumb dare. This is one of those. David Macpherson, writer of obscure old pop culture, got a box set of the Inner Sanctum movies. He decided to watch them and write a book about the process. Just to make it more interesting, he decided to do the whole thing while drinking. Didn't we call this dumb? We weren't lying. The Inner Sanctum films are six movies made by Universal in the mid-1940s. They all star Lon Chaney, Jr. They all are mysteries with a dash of the macabre. Some of them are good and watchable. Some of them are the longest one-hour films ever made. David writes with wit, sarcasm and thoughtfulness about these mostly forgotten movies. He delves into issues of plot and the personal history of Lon Chaney. He loses himself and writes tiny little memoirs inspired by the movies spooling out in front of him. He gets through all six and only has this book and a major hangover to show for it.

Lon Chaney is Dead: Watching the Inner Sanctum Movies Drunk - The Library of Disposable Art, #5

What kind of writing can you get done in three days? David Macpherson wrote a memoir in three days. He liked it so much, he did it five more times. What you have in this book are the six small memoirs he wrote in three days a piece. You will learn about the ins and outs of being a Rocky Horror kid. Or you experience a youth remembered in reference to the TV shows he watched. How about a small memoir about reading books while walking the dog? That's there too. David wrote of the difficulty of being a young special needs teacher working with aggressive students. There is one about watching flicks at a movie theater during the Covid Pandemic. And finally, David created a memoir/manual about how to write a memoir in three days. All different topics, all just one person. Written with honesty, humor and warmth, these little glimpses at person can let you see the whole. Pick up a copy because looking at small details can tell a large story

Six Brief Memoirs

Aren't you tired of books with plot and character and just want to read simple lists? Us too. And with that in mind, we have included four of the small books that David Macpherson wrote. They demonstrate the different ways lists can be presented as a piece of writing. "501 Things to Be Wary Of" is just a goofy litany of stuff. "367 Things to Do While Sitting Out a Pandemic" was written in March 2020, when the Covid lock-down began. This can be not seen as a historical record of what one person was thinking of when a world wide crisis began. "But Beware" is fifty versions of the speech given by a ragged man in the beginning of a fantasy campaign. "My First Decade of Movies" is labeled a list-memoir. David attempts to create a list of all the movies he saw in the theater before he was ten and write a little bit about each. Four different lists. One entertaining experience.

Four Books of Lists

What you have here is a collection of fifty brief, silly-ass stories. None of them are long, so you don't have to suffer through one for pages and pages if you don't dig it.  For this blurb, we include a bonus story. You can read it and see if you want to pick up this book and read the others.  It's up to you. It's always up to you.  Here is the free story we have given to you just because we like your face. "Surfing "One of the difficult parts of surfing is someone trying to take your wave. One wave per customer. It's better that way. "This one guy thought he had a perfect wave all to himself. He got into position and then saw that he was not the only one. Right in the sweet spot was a large anti-ship mine. It was a mine that blew up destroyers.  "And now it was destroying this ride. It was killing it. Who knew that World War 2 era bombs could surf so well.  "What could the surfer do but allow the mine to take the wave. The mine deserved the wave. It was having a blast." See. That's kind of a story in this kind of a book. You should kind of buy it and read more masterpieces like this one.

Little Adventures

How do we wrap up the life of a loved dog in 40 pages?  Well. We can't. Come on. Love and grief do not fit easily onto a page. This is a translation of that love, that grief.  David's dog passed on November 15th, 2023 and he began this book that evening. What you see is the unstructured testament of a friendship between a dog and a family.  It moves from when Fitzy was adopted to when he passed away at the age of 15.  He was a good dog. This little book is a modest memorial for a friend.

Fitzy

What is the best part of a detective story? We think it's the moment that the detective presents the evidence. The detective gives a list of strange, unrelated items and from them, the criminal is discovered. That might be the best part. This book is nothing but the good parts. There are 40 tiny stories where we meet a detective and they let us know what the crime is and give the clues. And that's it. What about the big reveal of who the bad guy is? We leave that to you. This is a collection of experimental short fiction that gives hints of different genres and tones. Can you solve all these crimes before it's too late?

The Detective Presents the Evidence

Can action figures give you happiness?  There are many toy manufacturers who certainly hope they do. They made commercials to explain how you can play with them and what joy you should find in these Barbies and G. I Joe.  This brief book primarily looks at the commercials for the toy playsets and the extra characters.  This is a joyful look at the way the commercials tried to inform our desire and the way we play.

All Figures Sold Separately - The Library of Disposable Art, #7

A collection of dumb things the writer texted to his friend, Gary. Gary did not listen to any of these suggestions. You probably did not even read them. That's Gary for you.   It is a dust devil of absurdist ideas and configurations. This could be the kind of book you need to read if you are waiting for the volcano to erupt.  Author Jeffrey Campbell read some of this book and gave this blurb that's good enough to be on the cover, "Yeah. I think this is one of your books that I will be skipping."   I Have a Little List is an occasional ezine where dumb lists are the king and queen.

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